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Cockburn finds Madison Cawthorn — the first-term Republican congressboy from North Carolina, defeated in a GOP primary last night — an interesting study. His behavior reminds Cockburn of a Capitol Hill freshman fraternity pledge who just can’t seem to get the rules of the house down.
Cockburn never seems to see Cawthorn’s name in the headlines for anything but scandalous reasons: his past is riddled with sexual misconduct allegations, bizarre vacations that involved dressing in lingerie and taking seductive photos with white wine, and dubious claims surrounding his “derailed” career at the Naval Academy (where he wasn’t accepted) and about the aftermath of an accident that led to his paralysis (he’s seeking $30 million in a lawsuit related to the incident).
There was also that time he referred to Hitler as “the Fuhrer” in a now-deleted Instagram post.
Since being elected, Cawthorn has found himself in continuous hot water for speaking at the January 6 “Stop the Steal” demonstration and for accusing fellow lawmakers of cocaine-fueled “sexual perversion” (takes one to know one?). Cawthorn has been caught speeding — twice — driving with a revoked license, trying to carry a gun onto an airplane — twice — and has gotten married and divorced, all in little more than a year in office.
These days, you’ll find Cawthorn fending off insider trading allegations from fellow North Carolina Republican senator Thom Tillis, who has called for Cawthorn’s involvement in the “Let’s Go Brandon” cryptocurrency to be probed by the House Ethics Committee.
If Cockburn didn’t know any better, he’d wonder if Cawthorn and his contrived, WASPy name were not a left-wing golden boy supplanted by the Democrats to make Republicans look bad. Cawthorn, for his part, blames the glut of negative press on Democrats “running out of things to throw at me.”
“The left and the media want to use my words to divide the GOP,” Cawthorn said.
But the GOP isn’t divided over Cawthorn, and they aren’t defending him. “Cawthorn’s penchant for stoking controversy is starting to wear on many Republicans,” reports Politico. More than anything, Cawthorn’s outrageous antics seem to be uniting the parties, as both come together to denounce him.
When CNN reported that Cawthorn “called Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky a ‘thug’ and the Ukrainian government ‘incredibly evil,’” the network noted that his words were “in sharp contrast to the United States’ broad bipartisan support for Ukraine.”
And in his call to investigate Cawthorn, Tillis, too, said the inquiry needs to be thorough and “bipartisan.”
Both sides are also upset over Cawthorn’s continued lies, with the right outraged over his cocaine and orgies claim, and the left (namely Rolling Stone) apparently disappointed Cawthorn’s story isn’t true.
Cockburn thinks Cawthorn can save American politics by keeping up with his clownery, which is bringing both sides together in their mutual distaste for this political piñata, stuffed full of daft commentary and foolhardy conduct.
For his part, Cockburn will sit back, sip his gimlet, and wax nostalgic about his own wilder days, when the only person the Madison Cawthorn types had to answer to for their mischief was the dean, not the nation.
