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The restaurant world was devastated this week after learning a fact our cousins across the Pond have been telling us for some time: that James Corden is a huge douchebag.
The Late Late Show host found himself on the blacklist of swanky New York haunt Balthazar, after owner Keith McNally described the Brit as his “most abusive customer.”
Now, one enterprising company that provides signage to restaurants is offering its clients a “free digital sign” to Iet Corden know he’s banned from their establishments too.
Australia-based Mandoe Media breathlessly rushed the signs out in a press release. A bit too quickly for Cockburn’s liking, as the company appears to have skipped the spell-checking stage. One reads, “DONT BE LIKE JAMES: TREAT STAFF WITH RESPECT!” — no apostrophe necessary, apparently — while the other encouragers guests to “PLEASE REPORT SIGHTINGS OF THIS MAN TO MANAGMENT.”
Balthazar’s McNally lit into Corden on Instagram for, after finding a hair in his food, demanding of management: “Get us another round of drinks this second. And also take care of all of our drinks so far. This way I [won’t] write any nasty reviews in Yelp or anything like that.”
On another occasion, per McNally, “Mr. Corden’s wife ordered an egg yolk omelette with Gruyere cheese and salad.” He continues:
A few minutes after they received the food, James called their server, M.K. and told her there was a little bit of egg white mixed with the egg yolk. M.K. informed the floor manager, G. The kitchen remade the dish but unfortunately sent it with home fries instead of salad. That’s when James Corden began yelling like crazy to the server: “You can’t do your job! You can’t do your job! Maybe I should go into the kitchen and cook the omelette myself!”
If there’s a word to be said in Corden’s defense — though it pains Cockburn to do so — it does sound like McNally’s chefs messed up his order both times. But this does not excuse the tenor of the host’s complaints: there’s a space in Dante’s seventh circle of Hell for people who are rude to waitstaff, alongside animal abusers and petty dictators.
Mandoe Media apparently agrees. “We have always supported our clients and their staff,” CEO Steve Baxter says in a press release. “Any poor behavior towards serving staff should always be discouraged and I hope that we can help to highlight that issue here.”
In a subsequent Instagram post, McNally rescinded the ban. “James Corden just called me and apologized profusely,” he wrote. “Having fucked up myself more than most people, I strongly believe in second chances… anyone magnanimous enough to apologize to a deadbeat layabout like me (and my staff) doesn’t deserve to be banned from anywhere. Especially Balthazar… All is forgiven.”
Like McNally, Cockburn is a forgiving sort. But he wonders if the restaurateur has been too hasty: this is not Corden’s first trangression. Cast an eye over this entry in the (excellent) British gossip newsletter Popbitch from back in 2017:
Half an hour into a New York to London flight, passengers in business class noticed a woman with a crying baby being brought through the curtains by a flight attendant. They looked on in mild horror as they saw the attendant direct her into an empty seat next to… James Corden.
Expecting a huge celebrity hissy fit to kick off, Corden’s cabin-mates were impressed to see that he didn’t say a word or make any sort of complaint. He simply put on a pair of noise-cancelling headphones, pulled an eye-mask over his eyes, and turned away from her to sleep.
Pretty decent of him, right?
When the plane landed though, passengers were surprised to see Corden remain seated as the woman with the baby struggled to open the overhead locker.
And even more surprised when she turned to Corden and said “For fuck’s sake can you at least hold the baby while I get the bags down?”
The woman was his wife.
The baby was his baby.
Then consider the film adaptation of Cats.
Surely before deporting him from these shores, we should consign Corden to the drive-thru.
