Your business may have closed, your kids still aren’t in school, nana hasn’t had a hug in 18 months, and your uncle drank himself to death from the crippling isolation — but the real tragedy of the COVID-19 pandemic is that the luckless fats are feeling stigmatized again.

Over the weekend the Los Angeles Times detailed the tearful struggle of being grotesquely obese in the age of COVID-19. ‘Chrystal Bougon cried after the needle went into her arm. Not because her first dose of the Moderna vaccine hurt. But because, finally, being fat actually paid off,’ the article begins. ‘Her experience with medical providers has been one incident of size stigma after another, she said, like the time she went in with a scratched cornea and was told to lose weight. She fears being hospitalized with COVID-19 and unable to advocate for herself.’

California, where this particular fatty lives, prioritized free vaccinations for the corpulent. But it’s not enough that people with obesity, as some land whales prefer to be called, are getting priority treatment for vaccinations, they’re now fee-fi-fo-thumbing for doctors to stop reminding them precisely why they’re first in line.

COVID death rates are skewed heavily toward the fats. According to the CDC, 78 percent of people who were hospitalized or died from COVID-19 were obese. Think about that. If the whole, unsuccessful reason for the ongoing lockdown was to ‘slow the spread’, if transmission of the virus had to be mitigated in order to prevent hospitals from becoming overwhelmed — and that’s the only reason we’ve ever been given — isn’t it fair to say fat people are entirely to blame for the devastation of the last year? Being fat isn’t like being old, it’s a choice. We don’t need less fat stigmatization — we need more.

‘Wear a mask’, ‘wear two masks‘, ‘get vaccinated or else you don’t care about others’, the mentally-ill Fauci-fangirls continue to shriek. Yet, this whole time it appears it’s the fats who deserved the scorn. This is all their fault.

‘The pandemic has highlighted a clash between the medical establishment and the fat acceptance movement, between those who use clinical terms such as “obesity” and “overweight” and those who proudly describe themselves as “large-bodied,” “people of size,” “fat,” and even “super fat,”’ the LA Times article claims.

Really I can think of only one thing the fats deserve to be upset about. As airlines blocked out seats on planes to slow the spread, the fats too petrified to leave their styes during the pandemic missed out on an opportunity to finally fly comfortably for the price of only one ticket.

The LA Times article goes on to tell the story of a 24-year-old ‘black, non-binary’ ham beast who uses ‘they’ and ‘them’ pronouns being greeted at the hospital one evening by a medical worker proclaiming, ‘Wow, you’re so big. The first thing we need to do is get this weight off you.’

Apparently readers weren’t supposed to laugh at that. ‘Weight stigma by healthcare providers has been documented for decades,’ the article continues.

Doctors are the Literally Hitlers of the fat acceptance movement and the fats expect special treatment over other groups who are committing gradual suicide as a result of their disgusting lifestyles. But instead of Joe Biden’s politically weaponized CDC ensuring that fatties don’t sink our economy when the next virus from China hits, the organization has instead decided to tuck the obesity stuff away and declare racism the public health crisis du jour.

No other group would be given the ink to complain about this. Heaven forbid after your ninth consecutive positive test for chlamydia your doctor casually suggests you might consider wrapping it up every once in a while. As someone who recently kicked cigarettes, smokers are accustomed to this sort of shaming from doctors. You don’t hear any of them complaining about it.

In the realm of the stridently unhealthy, smokers are better people than the fats. Almost everyone is. Get in a smoker’s face and tell them they stink and will die a gruesome death from lung cancer and they’ll more than likely shrug and agree with you. Gently suggest to a fatty they lay off the Shoney’s unless they want a leg amputated in five years and they’ll come at you in a tsunami of fangs and rippling flesh like a territorial elephant seal during mating season. Oddly, marijuana obsessives are similarly defensive, I’ve noticed.

And that’s what makes the body positivity people so enduringly repulsive, aside from what your eyes take in. You can’t take anyone so stubborn and thin-skinned seriously. No one thinks they’re large and loving it. The best the fativists can hope for is feigned sympathy and for others to merely suffer through them. And that extends to all the left’s crybullies. You can put as many pairs of cottage cheese thighs on the cover of Cosmopolitan as you’d like, but you’re never going to convince people that it’s aspirational. Humans, aside from the odd chubby-chasing fetishist, are hardwired to avoid members of our species who we can tell are dying, intentionally in this case.

We’re also designed to want to help. If some of these people swallowed their doctor’s advice the way they took that midnight hoagie perhaps they’d finally provide others with something people are proven to enjoy — a transformation story.