Mega-jacked CNN host Chris Cuomo showed off his biceps on Twitter after a troll insulted his crown jewels.

The hoopla started Monday morning when an account with only 12 followers enraged the younger Cuomo after claiming the CNN host broke his arm by pleasuring himself.

‘That how this happened?! Hahahaha. Come on, baby, dont hate – facilitate. You can do better than this petty bs,’ Cuomo said in a tweet, accompanied by a picture of his veiny limb.

Conservative Twitter responded with a litany of penis jokes and pearl-clutching. ‘It’s too early on a Monday for this, Chris,’ the Daily Caller tweeted. NewsBusters’s Nicholas Fondacaro responded, ‘It’s from stroking your own “ego.”‘

Cuomo is not particularly renowned for his cool-headedness. In 2019 he famously confronted an individual at a festival for calling him ‘Fredo,’ the slow-witted brother of Michael Corleone in The Godfather.

‘Punk-ass bitches from the right call me “Fredo”. My name is Chris Cuomo. I’m an anchor on CNN,’ Cuomo said in a video shot on his cellphone. ‘They use that as an Italian slur — are any of you Italian?… It’s a fucking insult to your people. It’s an insult to your fuckin’ people. It’s like the N-word for us. Is that a cool fucking thing?’

‘If you want to play, we’ll fucking play,’ Cuomo said before storming off. The trolls should consider themselves lucky they insulted his junk online and not in person.

Cockburn is blown away by the sheer number of shriveled-up men from cable news who are willing to show off their physique online. Cuomo joins the likes of Fox Business’s Charlie Gasparino, known for his boomer mirror selfies at the gym. And, of course, who can forget the infamous nude bathroom selfie from Geraldo Rivera in 2013?  Whatever the case, Cockburn can’t help but wonder if some of the hate directed at Fredo is rooted in envy. Perhaps in the era of 300-pound transgender Victoria’s Secret models, conservatives should be celebrating Cuomo’s proudly masculine biceps. To quote the late George Carlin, ‘This is the best we can do, folks.’